A forum for those who have experienced death, as well as those interested in the subject of death and studies thereof.

    Cloe's death experience


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    Join date : 2012-05-08

    Cloe's death experience Empty Cloe's death experience

    Post  Admin on Wed May 09, 2012 12:41 am

    Cloe's death experience Thumbnail.aspx?q=4909405872128982&id=68c06c52ccafebdfa8a924b15759f685&

    So, as you can see, some really choice waves. Lots of fun for surfers. Yup, that's where I died. Well, actually under the waves, under the ocean. It's probably why I miss the ocean most of all in regard to Hawaii.

    I was once so afraid of the dark. You see, the dark was where he came at night and hurt me over and over again.

    Some wonder how or why I despise even the notion of an absolute, of a god of any sort? I had been convinced by a Catholic Nun for a full day, that a god did indeed exist. I had no doubt whatsoever, as I knew that I had found the answer and that this god with its might and righteousness would surely come to my aid. So I prayed and prayed for protection, and put the two icons in strategic places. The Mother Mary next to my bed, and the cross bearing Jesus next to my door. There was no way that I would be hurt, no way.

    The next morning I learned that no god in fact existed as he threw the cross into my trash bin and left my bedroom.

    I was somewhere around six or seven years old when I lost my virginity to my step-father. My biological grand-father was also a pedophile. You get the picture by now, I'm sure.

    By the time I was eleven years old, I had been in so many fights and wanted only to self-distruct. My step-father had left my mother for another woman with three small children. I assure you it was not for their mother. I tried to help them by telling friends that knew the family. Eventually he was caught. My Mother tried to commit suicide and was in the hospital. This left me to watch over my sister and I.

    My neighbor, a woman named "Gloria" felt sorry for us girls, and asked if we wanted to go to the beach. She asked me where my favorite area was and I told her the North Shore. I even had a favorite spot where the waves were pretty steady.

    My sister and I were having a blast riding the waves. For some odd reason, we decided to bob around for awhile as we looked into shore. "Never turn your back to the ocean" is the old adage', that I learned is a good one to keep in practice.

    The wave that hit both of us, took my sister a few hundred yards down the beach. She would not go near the ocean again for over five years following this incident.

    I was however pushed down into the sandy bottom and then dragged deeper into the ocean. I fought like I have never fought since. I didn't have time to take in air and I was hurting and trying desperately to get to the surface, but the current wouldn't let me and I was pulled down and down and down.

    I heard a voice tell me to "BREATHE!". This voice called me by my given name. I knew that if I did what it said to do that I was going to die, so I tried again to reach the surface and I was in so much pain for air. The voice was now more forcefull and called me by my name again and said; "BREATHE!". But somehow now I knew that everything would be OK, so I took in the water and it hurt and I panicked one last time, then there was nothing but darkness,.. and I felt soooo good, and I knew that I was soooo safe! No more pain, no more fear, so safe.

    At that point, I thought "I must be dead",.. and that's when I had the most amazing experience imaginable! That part, I know was the beginning of the experience, but the sequences of what followed is difficult at best to put together, as I truly don't believe that they have anything to do with actual thought processes.

    I remember seeing through-out the ocean, and moving at incredible speed. What exactly was moving, I have no idea but what I witnessed was spectacular and beautiful, a vastness of blues, and very sparkly. I don't remember seeing any sea life except for when I thought of "WHY?" as in my horrible life experiences.

    Immediately I was right next to an echonoderm called a sea cucumber, which I had been extremely frightened of because my cousin on occassion found it funny to chase me with them in hand. Here I was right next to one, and I knew that I was looking at a version of myself. At this same moment, or at least I think it was at the same moment, I saw my step-father as a boy around my age. He or we were walking down a train track, and I felt a strong lack of respect or one might say a loathing for my mother (his mother). My dad (his dad) was dominant and belittled her and I found woman to be weak and of no importance. I must also add, that as I was him, I was also seeing him through some sort of what looked like a TV screen and it was in black and white (until today, I have no idea why this was featured).

    As all this is happening, I also was next to my neighbor Gloria and she couldn't see me as I was in front of her face looking directly at her. I knew that I could go into her if I had wanted to as I felt her pain over the loss of my husband (her husband) and I found out that I had a daughter (her daughter).

    She was looking all over the ocean area for us and the panic set in as she noticed my sister. There were also a couple of surfers that had come in to shore and one was beginning to look around. As Gloria ran toward my sister, I was there waiting and could see that she would be ok.

    One of the surfers went up to the road to call for help. With all this going on, I wanted to know more and I was about to know everything as I started to remember,.. and I was right of the verge of remembering when I found myself in my body again and I felt as though I was being pulled now to shore very rapidly. As I hit the sand on the shore, the water gushed out of my mouth with such force that I just sorta held my mouth open like a hose. My body was an awful thing to be back in,.. and now I was being screamed at by Gloria and one of the surfers made a comment about almost calling rescue or something of the sort.

    Since that day, I have no fear of death or the dark. There's so much more to understand and so much to remember.

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